Sunday, February 5, 2017

How to get rid of the postpartum blues before they begin.

What every Momma should know before they have a baby!

1.  If you start feeling down or don't feel quite like yourself tell someone!  Just the act of telling someone is healing and therapeutic.  This way you are not carrying the burden alone.  Negative thoughts breed negative thoughts, nip those thoughts in the bud at the beginning.  Don't let them stay for too long.  With that said it's OK to have a cruddy day or to feel down sometimes, but don't let it get the best of you.

2.  Get out of the house.  I remember my midwife telling me that you need to get out of the house. This is important when having a new child.  Get out of the house?  But where do I go?  Join a moms group!  This sounded daunting to me.  A moms group was something I had to commit to on a weekly basis.  This was not me at the time.  I didn't want to commit to something.  However looking back I wish I would have. I didn't have to go every single week if I didn't want to.  But what if I didn't like the other moms?  Find a new group.  There is no harm in that.  With that said I did make lots of play dates with other moms.  This was so fun for me.  I loved every minute of spending time with other moms and learning from them.  So whether you decide to join a moms group or make up your own.  Just do something.


3.  Don't take life too seriously.  My friend who had two children at the time said some words that stuck with me.  Judge Away!  While this is very hard for me as I tend to care too much about what people think of me; I think this will go along way when raising children.  Judge Away.  If your child doesn't have socks on at the grocery store, and everyone at the grocery store decides to tell you, you are an awful parent;  Let the the words come to mind JUDGE AWAY!  I mean life is not wrapped up in a pretty little package as some like to think. Sometimes just getting out of the house with a baby is a feat all on it's own.  You made it to the store to buy groceries, you deserve a gold medal.  And instead of patting you on the back for that you get criticized for not putting socks on your child, that will come off in ten seconds flat. So repeat in your mind, Judge Away and smile while doing so!


4. Make time for you.  You will hear this over and over and over.  It will probably begin to sound like a broken record.  I didn't do this much with my first child because I didn't really feel the need to as much.  However, I did schedule a massage for myself the second week after giving birth while, my mom was in town.  So that was nice! It can make a huge difference.  You might think you have to be selfless now that you are a mother.  That you have to give everything you have and are to this new baby.  Yes, be a good mother to your child, be a great mother to your child.  Be such a great mother to your child that you show him/her by your example that it is ok to take care of yourself.  Take a shower, work out to some yoga tapes.  Your child will learn from you how to take care of themselves one day.  No pressure, right!  Also a hot shower/bath at the end of the day goes a long way!  Another secret tip I learned from a mom friend!

5. Accept help and hire out help if you can afford it.  Support, support, support, whether you need to buy a ton of freezer meals the first few weeks  postpartum, do it.  Need to hire a cleaning lady to help out.  Do it!  You need all the support you can get.  If  Someone asks to come over and watch your child while you go take a shower LET THEM.  Someone did that for me and I will never forget it.  I'm so glad she didn't feel awkward asking me that, and I'm so glad that I had the courage to say Yes.  It feels so good relying on others for help. If people offer to bring you meals.  Let them.  Accept help. Pretty Please:)

*Please note that postpartum depression is a real thing.  If you are experiencing any signs of depression, sadness that won't go away, please tell your Dr. or Midwife and seek professional help.  You don't have to do it alone.  There is help available.